The Suffering Podcast
Adversity is the common thread throughout the lives of all living human beings. This human condition can either make us or break us. Nothing great comes easy and it's the overcoming of adversity that makes us who we are. Living by the ethos Suffering is THE way to sustainable success and the path to greatness. Always remember Mike Failace.
The Suffering Podcast
Episode 78: The Suffering of A Police Officer
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We don’t realize how difficult a job police work can be. The difficult calls, the stress on their
bodies, police were can take a toll on your physical and mental health. On this episode we
welcome back Mike DePalma to discuss the suffering of police. All three of us know too well the difficulties, the highs, the lows, and the Suffering that police work involves. In the studio we deal with this topic and much the same way we deal with most topics, through laugh and humor just as we did when we were on the job.
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0:51
This is gone. It's time for the sufferings podcast podcast. We run through our lives searching for meaning. There is a serenity and finding a place in this world. Going job, the job or lifestyle, the lifestyle, we never really reach that type of peace and purpose that everyone is searching for. You'll find people saying, I know I'm meant for something more. That's often because they're in a wrong current situation. That situation is comfortable, and often comfort will slowly kill you. Those that are lucky enough to find a purpose in life. They become fulfilled, happier, and much more pleasant to be near. We look up to these people hoping to grab on to what they found. The secret sauce that makes their life worth living. I'm Kevin Donaldson here with Mike Felice. We're back with another episode of the suffering podcast today we sit down and we bring back one of our oldest and dearest friends. The hurricane himself. Mike dipalma is in studio Mike. Thanks so much. It's great, man. It's awesome to see you. It's really really good.
1:57
And Mike did notice that Kevin doesn't read the intros live anymore. I mean, I do
2:02
get it I actually like Well, I think they're in Mike's original episode, which was like episode 13. If I mistaken. You read the episode, just so you read the opening, and I got through it without a hitch. Oh, without a hitch. It was about 10,000 ohms and ahhs don't don't believe the editing buddy quiet. Before we get to anything. I want to thank our marquee sponsor, that's Toyota of Hackensack. If you're looking for a car that let them help you find a car, go to Toyota hackensack.com I buy my cars there, because they're the one few car dealers that I trust, they treat you right, they treat you like somebody special, you're not just a number that walks in the door. So go to Toyota hackensack.com. Also, don't forget to visit Bella dama cigars.com put in the code suffering 10 for a 10% discount. Chantal has been one of our most advocate, advocates, and she continues to do so. So go support her because she supports us
2:50
and Telstra until we said hi when you call her
2:54
to Mike De Palma. So great to see
2:57
the the palm i Miss, I miss you guys the hurricane like himself,
3:02
we missed you too. But we'll take better.
3:05
I had a few hurricanes after you know, just just little ones.
3:09
Before we get into any because it's gonna be nuts. I've already prepared for it. Let's get into this week's social media question. And this one comes from Susan says, Have you ever come across anyone you believe should have never been a cop? Mike, you're our guest today. So I want to lay this one off on you. You worked in an inner city department of Hoboken? And I'm sure you've seen you know, throughout your whole career, you've seen many come and go. What do you think? Yeah, I'm sure you've seen people that have should have never been cops that correct? Sure. Or what do you think the characteristics of somebody who
3:39
you're asking one?
3:40
Yeah. People said that about might stop that. Now. What do you think the characteristics of somebody who should never be a cop is because Susan, this is this is kind of a general question. But I pulled this because we're doing the suffering of police today. And we've all seen people who should never been cops, but I want to talk about characteristics. What do you think a characteristic is somebody who should have never got the job.
4:04
I would say being on the street, and watching somebody for the first time. And, you know, everybody has an instinct, you could tell somebody who just didn't really care, you know, for what was going on or anything around them. You could I think it's just first encounter. You could just tell I think every every police officer whether you're new whether you're older, you can you can just tell somebody's personality. It's the
4:36
situational awareness that seems to break down when you see these these young guys, Mike, you you've had a long career. And you've seen him come and go and you've seen people at the beginning of their career in the academy when you taught there. What do you think are some of the characteristics of somebody who should never be a cop?
4:52
You know, I think one of the main things of being a good cop is street smarts. You know, like you said, situational awareness. I mean, you're getting these kids that are getting out of college and this is their first job, they got no world experience, you know, and the only reason they're getting it is because of entitlement. You know, Daddy has some poll with the mayor or something like that. So these, these guys are getting out of college and thinking this is the real world, and they don't even know the real world yet. You know, we have guys, you know, it'd be five minutes before your shifts over and you get that alarm call, of course, on the furthest end of town, you and you send them down, and it's like, oh, you know, I can't believe I gotta go. Shut up and do the job. Take
5:32
your overtime, you make 30 grand, I mean,
5:34
then the square wheels kick in and
5:37
y'all got the square wheels, you know, you're right.
5:39
It really just cracks me up to these. They really take the job for granted. You know, I know you need a college education and get a job now. And I think that is mainly because you speak you'll be able to get the job at 18 years old. Now a college education, you have to be at least 2122.
5:55
Well, the criteria has changed the way the job is done. It you've read some of these old timey reports, handwritten reports and stuff. It's like, yeah, I went here and I talked to the lady and everything's fine. And that was their report.
6:08
Our guys just put like medical call give the address transported to this hospital. That was it.
6:13
For me, it's pretty simple. I think there's there's a couple different people that become cops, some of them it's it's just a job. It's just and that's honestly why I got the job. It was just a job. I found out quickly it was more than just a job. But then there's the people who got shoved in lockers as high school in high school. And they get a little bit of power and they get power hungry. We've all seen that throughout the throughout our careers that people who get power hungry, they abuse the shit out of that power. And they hide behind the gun in the bed and you watch them in the in the public. They treat the public like shit. And then there's the situational awareness where you just you're oblivious to everything I remember a new officer came in and he stopped the car and we had the backup the new officers on every stop. And he goes up to the car and he puts his fingers his hands on the door jamb. With the with the Windows only halfway down. He goes like this. And He's halfway in the car. I go, What are you doing what's pull him back? I said, you know, not in front of the people. I said, What are you doing? You know, well, if they roll their window up, and you're halfway in the car, guess what you're going for a ride, whether you want to or not. So it's instinct, it's you got to you got to drop your ego, you got to release that power trip. And those are the people I don't think should ever be a cop. And there's there's plenty of them out there. Because we all need hooks to get in. Let's give everybody a little insight on how people get the job. And it's not an uncommon thing for me to Hey, Mike, who's your hook? I already know I we've talked about it. I know you're who's your hook. So explain to everybody what a hook is.
7:43
A hook is somebody that pretty much pushes for you whether it's high ranking, whether it's, you know, political, so forth and so on. And then a factor,
7:53
right, you'd never go somebody to somebody in a corporate world say, Hey, who's your hook, it just it's kind of, it's just not done?
8:00
I'll tell you a great story about that. When I first came on the job, there was a lieutenant that lived across the street from me growing up, you know, so he saw me in my little fun and crazy little world I was in, you know, on the block and something came about and that actual word was used. And they go, this guy's got a big hook here. And I'm like, What are you talking about? And that big hook was the chief of police, you know, so it's, you know, but in were, you know, in a city, Hoboken, we still had to take a test, you know, and prior to that I was military. So you know, it was just, it was a common thing used,
8:39
but there's a lot of people that were in your same situation without that hook without that hook. And here's the value of a hook. The value of a hook is you're coming in basically on their name. So they're not going to want anybody in, who's a bonehead. Those days are going away. And I think that might be some of the problem.
8:55
Well, you know, there's a lot of talk about, like nepotism and all that, you know, is it right? No, is it wrong? Not totally, not totally. You know, what you're getting? Yeah. You know, you got a kid whose father has been a cop and a kid's been hanging around a cops his whole life, you know, especially like small town like Linares. You know, you knew the kid growing up. You knew what he was all about. He knew what he was doing, you know? So sometimes it's good to actually know the person because you know, right from the get go, what you're getting.
9:25
And they've been schooled. They've been schooled behind the scenes I had, I work with a kid and I worked with his father for a very short time before he retired. And I remember his father telling him he told me this. He says if you gotta go talk to somebody, talk to me. Don't talk to any Don't Don't tell anybody your problems inside the police department, which we all are very guilty of. But that that was some old school schooling. You know, those things are going away. I watch people where I work now because I still am involved with a lot of the local police. They don't want to take road jobs anymore. Like real jobs are good money. There's your entitlement. There's your entitlement act. But yeah, those those types of people, there's lots of different ways to get the job. So let's discuss the different ways you can get that job. Of course, there's your hook, what are some different ways that you know,
10:10
even even with a even with a hook, if it's a civil service exam that you know, there's really nothing? You know that
10:16
they have the one in three with civil servants to Well, right. So someone comes out number four that happens to be related to the chief right? They're gonna skip someone one in three
10:26
Agree, Agree. And even my, my situation, I think I was number 77. On the civil service exam, you know, at the time, it wasn't a veteran, so it went all the way down so you could see, you know, people were being eliminated, you know, and they actually got to me and Nikki Burke, we were both back to back.
10:44
Let's get back.
10:45
I love Nikki Berg.
10:46
Let's get back to the social media question. People who shouldn't have gotten a job.
10:50
You know what, wait a minute. I just thought about some of that social media. I don't want to keep on going back. But Mike made a good point. You know, he may let her know you you growing up in the town you work in you see what's there. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? So that's, that's another way you could say, Hey, this guy might not be a good cop, but not in all situations. You know, some some people just become great cops, you know, but
11:15
in Mike's case, he was just very good at fellating Fellini.
11:20
I just Yeah, wait, I just want to know, translate it. How am I doing? Right now?
11:26
I got Well, I had to dust off my department dictionary. So I'm good. For those of you who will have subtitles in English for Mike dipalma
11:35
Andrews got a Hudson County interpreter so he knows what's going on.
11:40
So whenever you hear the term water, like water,
11:45
black cherry caffeine, what's actually great.
11:48
It's really good to listen to Ron Ron owns from Mickey's pub, we've been there. We've hung out there. Hey, you got to Mickey's on I was I was gonna wear my thank God. I didn't look like a schmuck wearing a red shirt on podcast.
12:00
Because you wouldn't look as good as me but God.
12:03
So Ron, Ron's always been on our side. I just wanted to give a big shout out and thank you to caffeine. But there's I joke when I say fellating which is getting on your knees and I used to call them promotion pads. So everyone every time you got a promotion, that's that's some thicker kneepads coming as
12:23
well schooled and fellating
12:25
Yeah. It was so good for you, they kind of fashioned your name out of it right?
12:32
And made it to Lieutenant.
12:34
Exactly, exactly. Is it take a lot of duck butter in his mouth for that one.
12:40
Did you know my chiefs last night.
12:44
Got. But this is this is part of the job. It's part of laughing and being able to interact with your other officers. And we joke around a lot and you everybody sees that we joke around a lot. But there are some people who come in this job who think that they're like Mr. Clean, and they're not going to joke around and they never really get it, they never really get it. And those are the people that usually burn out very quickly.
13:06
Oh, without a doubt, you know, if you're going to if you're going to eat this job, or you're going to take everything home with you, you know, you have to have some kind of way of releasing it. You know, we call it all the time, you know, fill in the glass, you know, if you keep if that glass keeps getting filled and gets getting filled in, and you don't have a way of decompressing. I mean it the job's gonna eat you up.
13:27
It's funny, you bring that up because in the intro, which you two are not privy to yet, because I'm going to hide that from both of you. I talk about how everybody's given a glass in the beginning of their life, and that glass is used to fill only a certain amount of shit. And police officers glass are built no differently than everybody else's. But if we don't release it, it will eventually spill over
13:48
bring up the prairie pirates. I
13:49
don't know but I hashtag prairie fire. I do hashtag so listen, for those of you out there, I want you to make a comment. I want you to hashtag prairie fire and hashtag real Kevin Donaldson and I will get back to you. I promise you I will get back to you
14:03
hashtag up so
14:07
you gotta get up to date with these hashtag things. Do you guys are doing it to me again?
14:12
Not really confused me. He's like you got a hashtag? A hashtag? Is that number sign thing?
14:18
I don't I couldn't tell you what they do. But I know you got to do it. That's all I got. That's all I'm gonna tell you.
14:22
We say hashtag this
14:28
hashtag hurricane Mike. Hashtag keeps suffering. I remember I was actually excited when used to do that hashtag keep suffering. I did hashtag that. Yes. So hashtag is just a little buzzword. Get the word out there. So if somebody searches by keyword, they can find your stuff. That's that's what it is. But so we joke around a lot. But there's a lot of different reasons and especially there's diversity in this room as far as why we took this job. And there's diversity across the country why people take their job. There's some people who take it for just a job some people have a calling Why some people are forced into the job through nepotism? Are there any other ways that you know, or any other reasons why you think people take this job? Dead Silence,
15:10
I was gonna say, you know, a lot a lot of guys are like, like glory seekers, you know, they, you know, they see the shiny uniform, and, you know, they get to go out and impress people and, and these are the guys who get jammed up because they're the guys that just get out of the academy to go into a bar. And they got the constructor hip in the bar, just to show that they're a cop. But you know, look at me, I'm a cop now.
15:30
You know, God, was fanny packs.
15:34
I still got one I loved I loved it.
15:36
I loved it. I loved
15:37
but why did you become a cop?
15:41
He got fired from Burger King. They made him?
15:49
Oh, I guess? You know, I started in the military. And it was kind of similar to that. And that was my community, not my community. But I was born and raised. I lived there. I kind of loved it and
16:01
your Hoboken staple till? Well,
16:03
I mean, that was that. I mean, is it's there was you and still we and that's it. No, no, it's a unique town. And you know, it's a great town and supportive. And I don't know, I just, I, I really loved it. I loved it. And, you know, unfortunately, as the years went on, and I don't know, if everybody experienced that, it just, it wasn't fun anymore. You know, like I said, every single day, I used to love it, you know, 20 years, never took off. I love that, you know, smile. And it just, you know, and you know, things happen at the end of my career, but it didn't change. You know, what I did in a police officer, I was, you know, I, I enjoy I really enjoy that.
16:44
You know, I mean, and that's, that's really the difference between like, a good cop and bad cop. You got to thoroughly enjoy what you do. I'd love to know. I mean, me, me and Kevin, were talking a couple of weeks ago about you know, oh, they send you on this job, you know, because every call is called a job. My whole career, I never considered this a job. I consider this something I love to do. You know, I don't I can't remember one time in my career where I dreaded going to work that day. I mean, obviously, if he goes in for
17:15
a blow job, what else he was all in. He was very happy to do it.
17:20
And you'll see what this is going.
17:22
It's going to be a lot. All right, hashtag blow job.
17:26
Your pitch will come up.
17:28
I mean, you could tell I you know, both you guys I mean, it was I loved to do it.
17:35
I land. I loved it. I left more than I've ever left. I've cried. You know, I've taken the job home with me. But when I originally took the job, it was it was an offer. It wasn't a calling I took I took one police test. I only took one and I know guys do take dozens of police. So it took one police test because I had an opportunity to take it. And I got on. I had I did well, that's not true. I did have a hook. But he wasn't he wasn't like, he knew it wasn't my lifelong goal. But once I got in the job, everything changed. Everything changed. I realized very quickly that this was something I was meant to do. From the core of my soul. The problem was it got taken from me way too quick, way too quick. But you know, there's different reasons why people take the job. I see a lot of apathy. And if they look at strictly the dollar signs when you guys got on especially especially was top pay. I think top pay when I got on with 60,000 Yeah, you guys are you guys I noted
18:34
maybe I know my starting from my starting salary is 24,000. My starting was 33. You know, you didn't get an in for the money that long run.
18:44
Just seeing all your stuff, too. So you're in a hole already?
18:47
Oh, yeah. The inner cities always make you. I mean, so the academy itself is going to cost you that's a good point to get into like some of these inner city departments. I know Patterson was starting their their cops off at like 19,000 I used to live across the hall when I was living in an apartment with a guy who just got on Patterson 19,000 He had to buy everything they even had to buy their gun. Yeah,
19:07
there's certain departments that make you buy your own gun we'll give you we'll give you like three or four guns that you can buy. Yeah. And then you have to go by your only wish
19:13
to envy the guys up in the academy. Yeah, I just paid for this. And I'm like, Wow, that's great.
19:18
I don't think I could have done it if my department didn't pay because you're talking five grand. And if you go alternate route, it's even more.
19:24
That's when I started my account. Like my department booked me everything. Yeah, well, I mean, I was happy. They bought me so much. I didn't even have to steal ammunition from the rain.
19:42
When you guys started Flachau How
19:44
do you think we're gonna pay for
19:47
it? You don't. When even when I got on I know $60,000 Sounds like a lot of money and you would be you knew you were going to be okay. You were never going to be rich. And now the salaries are
20:00
It's incredible. Yeah, but nobody gets in law enforcement be rich. I think nowadays, but you're not going to be rich, you know? Yeah. Especially, especially in this area, living in this area, and raising a family in this area. Yeah. You know, if you told me when I was a kid, you're gonna make $150,000 I thought I'd be a millionaire. Oh, yeah, I mean, you're making $150,000 You're living almost paycheck to paycheck in New
20:23
Jersey, in New Jersey. So for everybody doesn't realize police officers in New Jersey, we're a little bit different than the rest of the world. We're not a right to work state, we are a union state. And the salaries can get very high. But what people got to realize is living in New Jersey is incredibly expensive. So we're a little different than the rest of the world. This is this should be the suffering of New Jersey police. Because we that's all we know, I know, you know, places in the south, they get paid, not even half of what New Jersey gets paid. But it also is half the cost of living. So it all sort of evens out in the wash. But you knew taking the job that you are going to you're going to be able to make a living, you're going to be able to support a family, you were going to be able to support the things that you wanted to do. But now, again, I'm going to I see it, I see it, some of these guys are getting paid so well. And I don't know whether that's the same zest is there for everybody like it was when I got on,
21:20
isn't it almost like a professional sports player? You know, how many guys you see they sign that contract? And they don't do they don't do shit after? Yeah, no, because now they got the money. I mean, look at some of these basketball players. One guy, I'm not going to play. I'm going to sit out because I'm having mental issues. mental issues we all know, or, you know,
21:43
every we shouldn't have went to work every single day.
21:47
Yeah, it's funny, because I was just just watching like this past basketball season. There's guys that are just saying like, you know, I'm not going to play this week. What have you called your chiefs? And now I'm not going to come into
21:58
here. Imagine if Dr. J or Wilt Chamberlain said that? Yeah. But to bring you to bring your point home, Mike, you might have appreciated the job a lot more because you had to go through the suffering. You appreciated it at the lowest levels as a purpose. And yes, as by the time you retired, by the time Mikey retire, things were different. Things were different. The salaries were better, you got to a better living wage. But you didn't get into it for that these kids now know, hey, listen, and their steps are and understand they've increased in steps. And now they got to do 30 years, the new guys
22:33
taught me a top step you got like a year left.
22:37
I think the average is 12. We I was four, four steps to top pay. I was seven. So we did have it a little bit easier in that regards. But we weren't making as much money.
22:47
I almost got the top pay with my first department. I transferred out about a year before I was gonna get the top pay. But it was all relative. I built myself up. Then I transferred out I had to build myself up again.
22:59
It was all relative. So I had an old lieutenant and he had retired and I know him so we're talking and stuff. And he was complaining about the high salaries of police. And I think at the time I just bought a house. My house was I think $400,000. And he goes yeah, when I started I was making I was making $8,000 a year. And I said well, you know not no disrespect to meanness but what you pay for your house. You bought your house for 20,000. He goes yeah, I paid 24th Exactly was 24,000 for his house. I said okay, so if you don't spend anything, anything in three years, you can pay off your house, I'm making $65,000 At the time, I bought a $400,000 house, it's going to take me a lot longer than you to buy that. So it was all relative. And again, with the new cops, I have to give them the credit on this one too. The houses are more expensive. So yes, it's going to take them longer to pay off their house. But that's just one of the reasons that I see. And I see that in current police society now that less of a purpose driven job and more of a hey, listen, I'm gonna get paid a lot, right?
24:03
It's a money driven job. And you know, like you said, you get these kids that are coming out of college. This is their first job. They're not making much money, but they're working all these construction details these road jobs. Yeah. $90 an hour, you know, and they're killing it every day off. These guys are working every day.
24:21
Now there's a term there's two terms here I wanted to find real quick. It's rookie and veteran. I never liked the term rookie. I always took offense to the term rookie or new officer. You just don't have enough street experience but you have more book smarts than I do. So I never call to get like it's that's that to me. That was just the the word that I never used. But well for this purpose. We'll call him a rookie. The differences between a rookie and a veteran Mike what do you what do you think the telltale aside from experience because that's a given.
24:53
Aside from the shiny shoes and you know to polish it brass squeaky leather, leather
24:58
400 Little Things On the low
25:02
end of PR 24 So
25:05
they've never done anything in a career and they already have like the citation.
25:11
So a PR 24 You guys are well aware, no cop ever carried their PR 24 Nobody did PR 24 Is the baton with the handle on it for people want to know. And I remember so I never put mine on I can honestly say that but a couple guys came out of the academy they're coming with a PR 24 I remember taking it out of his belt I'm like, and I throw it in the woods. Like it they
25:35
did we had a lot of fun in the academy PR 20 We had to keep them under the table on our you know, at our we they weren't desks they were just tables we used to put we had to put them there. And once one of them hit the ground, dropping a weapon so you had to do 25 Push ups. So you'd see a guy like fall asleep in front of you. Pull your chair back, hit your beer 24 We're gonna wake up to 25 push a lot it
26:04
was it was the most fun you ever had in the academy as a rookie. Ah,
26:08
you go with a rookie again as a new guy.
26:10
Any Academy
26:11
I told you for the purposes of this I'm going to use the term rookie. Any are first out on the road or in the academy Academy. Listen, the academy is hanging out
26:24
I'll be honest, I'll preface it by saying I went to the academy with my diploma.
26:31
I kind of got obsessed with that truck guy did you get to this day it drove me crazy. Let the roach coach and I used to love Nicki bursts reaction I'm telling you you don't want to stand gotta fucking Academy like a roach coach. Listen to me. There was a different price for the same thing every single day. Give me 380 And I'm like, it was 275 yesterday to Bodega banana and a water like a was this a water or what? I'm like this is Nikki one day just he got really upset. He goes, this is both disemboweled shit, I can't take it anymore. And that was like, We got obsessed with this guy.
27:07
So I actually had an opportunity to meet Nick. He's probably I Yes. I actually had the opportunity to have recently meeting because Greg and I said I can't imagine you guys in the fucking Academy together. Jesus was
27:19
I was a squad leader. And Nikki was on my squad. So whenever he got in trouble ship rolled up hill and I got in trouble the one time he didn't have his uniforms tailored. On the Friday before we're they're releasing us for the weekend. Training advisor comes up and says Burke, I want those uniforms tailored by Monday morning. He just looks at me goes No problem, sir. Lit into him. No problem, sir. I'd rather you say okie dokie, sir. Because your your squad leader, sir. Oh, he's getting my office right now. Like
28:04
most of my greatest joys. I was a squad leader. I was squad for I can remember very clear. I was squad four. And one of my greatest joys is my drill was guy named Jimmy marinara and I didn't realize the value from Hoboken. I didn't realize the value of Jimmy Jimmy was a force recon Marine. Like he was like Scott Farkas from A Christmas Story. Great like red hair green to smoke, like a chimney would still run a five minute mile could stay in the lane and rest for days. And he was a little guy, right? He's about this tall and he talked with stutter serious heart attack. It was hard not to laugh at him. He was so serious. But I used to have to follow him for inspection. And my stomach has always fucked up in the academy. So I had fallen for inspection get in front of somebody and I fart. And I didn't have to stand there. I had a captive audience. They had to smell it. It was one of my greatest joys.
28:51
That's so that's so torturing
28:55
looking at him, and I didn't even move their lips curling. Because again, I learned very early on that you can take the shit too seriously. It'll eat you alive. And they know it less than they can. It's all a game in the academy. We all know that it's breaking down build you up. paramilitary paramilitary I remember the first day I show up at the Academy and the guy the instructor who knew me through other people that didn't know him and he says, Donaldson You don't belong here. I was like okay, I turned I started turning my car around I'm like I guess I wasn't on the list. I guess I got fired before anything because now no no Quebec back here. I honestly thought I didn't belong. He was right though. He was right. I knew that was coming through that fucking softball right up for you. But you know there's there's a lot of different problems with police today. The current climate of police is very toxic. Bad Press. We all get judged by our lowest common denominator and it seems police today like I'm thankful I'm retired with what's going on today. I'm so thankful I'm not this isn't a political debate, but we get judged by this one asshole in Minnesota all of a sudden all police are bad but what do you think are some of the other problems that face police today? Social media social media you think they get a lot of trouble with that?
30:14
Definitely social media cameras and not that I'm saying that you know things were illegal when you know they weren't around it's just you know, it's the eyes are on them all the time no matter where you turn
30:25
Oh, you're talking on citizens against them? I thought cops posting stupid shit on social that's
30:29
another thing so social media I mean there's there's a million ways you can go with social media
30:35
Yeah. You know I used to there was back in the days that a flip phone cameras that's how you knew it was a good accident because all the troopers would be out there on the highway with their cameras out taking pictures of it. You somebody told me you can't even do that anymore. There's actually a memo put out you are not to take any pictures.
30:55
I rightfully so. Yeah. You're seeing people in their worst you know, their, their worst state. And last thing you want to do is have someone take a picture. I mean, like I mean,
31:04
I used to have my camera out because you get a car fire. And you know, with a car fire, the tires will explode. But everybody thinks it's a gas tank. And I used to get the newer officers out there in a car fire and I'd always have my cell phone back here waiting for the tire to explode watching them shit their pants. But the optics on police are so bad now. They're so bad. And I don't I don't understand how we got so far from us being saviors to being the bad guy all of a sudden, always the bad guy.
31:34
Well, like you said, it's the lowest common denominator. You know it for some reason people want to hate cops. Now. I don't know if it's like you said it's because of the salary. Or if you want to call it prestige of being a cop. They just like to just hate for cops. I just don't understand it.
31:54
Until they need us exactly. Until they need us once they need us. All of a sudden, we're pretty damn important. But the other thing that's going to come back the love for police. Are you think it's gone forever?
32:06
It's got to rebound. Sometimes it's
32:10
what it's what are you going to do have a lawless society to just let criminals run rampant? I mean, I know they're letting them do it. Now, when someone's going to finally step up and say, we can't have this anymore. Well, I did
32:20
see something recently. And it's encouraging to me. So I got I got some friends, I got a lot of friends that are still on. And he alerted me to this. And then I read it. So the new attorney general, the old Attorney General did not like police. And he put this pursuit policy in place where you don't chase for any nothing. And when I came up, it was you ran from the police. It was a second degree crime, which was something you could chase for. So you know, doesn't matter what you pulled them over where they committed a second degree crime. So he puts this pursuit policy out where you don't pursue for anything. You see a lot of police departments getting solely SUVs, never any crown Vics like we had. But this new guy that came in, he changed the pursue policy. So it's changing a little bit. It's a step. It's something, it's something but what else do you think needs to change in order to get that back? I mean, guy, you got that they got the body cams on the kingdom and shut them off when they go to take a leak that
33:18
there's not much being shown or said when police officers do real good. Yeah, that's exactly. You know, you see a police officer, you know, something goes wrong, and it's just plastered all over everywhere social media,
33:34
because, because that's what sells right? Click bait. That's, you know, nobody wants to see the cop that save the baby. Right? They all want to see the cup that stepped on his dick one day and got himself in trouble, right?
33:44
They, you know, they don't like, you know, the first, say 15 minutes. They don't want to show that, you know, they don't want to show you know what goes on prior to, you know, whatever an action is. And it's the same thing like, it's, I mean, I have to tell you guys, it's It wasn't an easy job. Well, it's, you know, mentally
34:01
we saw it. We all saw that in the Rodney King video. So what's kind of sad so Rodney King Rodney King video, some of our listeners are rather young, and they don't know who about the Rodney King video. Rodney King was a known criminal and had a bad drug problem. He's he's he takes the officers on a high speed pursuit to a residential neighborhood do it about 90 miles an hour to guys high as hell on PCP. And they catch him and it was somebody crashed though, right? I don't know. They tell him to get out and they they're cute. They're giving them direction. They keep telling him Get down, get down, get down, stop, but he keeps moving forward. He keeps moving forward. The cops are amped up from the chase. And did they take a couple bonus shots on him with their PR 20 fours? Absolutely. Absolutely. And they should pay the price for that. But they but you understand why they did it. They did it because their lives were just put at risk and they're pissed off. In that video, I've seen the entire video. You see the officers giving them direction and you sort understand why, even when they're hitting him, he's not going down. He's not totally stopping. So they go until the threat stops. That was a huge PR nightmare. And the police did some I guess 911 had a lot to do with the resurgence of the attitude towards police.
35:16
That you know, and for his as tragic as 911 was, there was never such a love for law enforcement and military back then. Yeah, people were just coming up to you and thanking you. It was incredible. Yeah, it was unbelievable, because
35:35
people got a glimpse of what lawless society looks like, yeah, they got a glimpse of it, then
35:40
people got a glimpse of what cops go through. I mean, listen, it wasn't us ever was, you know, Port Authority. It was NYPD and all that, you know, and the FBI and CIA and everybody else that was in there, dig in. And, you know, and the gruesome pictures of 911. I think that just endear people towards towards law enforcement at that point,
36:01
the unity amongst our own troops, because police let's face it, we're crabs in a barrel, you know, one tries to climb out the other ones try to pull them back down. And even the unity amongst police themselves. It's a very undercutting profession. We all were brothers and sisters at that point, and we've gotten far away from that. I think, again, you know, once somebody I said this for years that the attitude towards police is going to change due to an unfortunate accident. And I hope I'm wrong. I hope an unfortunate accident or act doesn't happen. But I think that's the only thing that's going to take it back to getting that problem resolved with the way police are viewed. But then there's another problem. And I want to bring this both up, because you're the big fucking offender. This is the administration. Yeah, Mike. Yeah. So
36:48
once you've once you've got above fender of administration. So
36:52
once you've got above Sergeant stripes, you are now an administrator, you are now a superior no longer a supervisor.
37:01
See, not necessarily in my role, though, as a patrol, patrol, Lieutenant, your job is the same thing as the sergeant. I heard you
37:10
were morale gear. You know what that is? With morale Geller in the military, something to make you happy. That was
37:18
oh, yeah, I'm like, trying to get me pinched. Again, you asked me these questions like, you might be honest,
37:25
I dealt
37:26
with this wasn't on the list.
37:29
I don't even have the list. To get me again,
37:31
I'm not picking on you specifically. Because I not to not to sit there and give you a hard on or anything. But I did hear very, very good things about working underneath you.
37:42
That is true that
37:43
that's not that's not the norm. No, it's not the norm.
37:47
Because when I got promoted, I took it very seriously and and took it very personally. You know, a lot of people that got a lot of people had to get me, a lot of people had to do some of these behind the scenes work to get promoted. And I never wanted to let anybody down. And I always told the guys that were working under me. I'm not gonna I'm not the type of guy that's gonna bark out orders, I'm not gonna say go do this, go do that, go do this. The way I gained the respect, I said, Let's go do this. You know, I'm gonna get your hands dirty kind of guy. I'm not gonna send my guys into fight, if I'm not gonna fight with them. You know, and that's the way I got guys respect. And like I said, being a lieutenant in my department, when you're a patrol Lieutenant. It's really the same thing as a patrol patrol sergeant. Because if that Lieutenant takes off that data, the sergeant is in charge of shift anyway. So you're, you know, you're not an administrative Lieutenant. That's where, like you said, the administration part comes in. I was I was a regular Field Guide.
38:55
But this this is something that everybody can relate to across the board. Because I've worked for a lot of good bosses, a lot of bad bosses inside police work and outside police work. And the best way I can drive this one home is, so I coach football, and I gave the ref a little crap. And a ref gave me a lot of crap, because he had the power to do so that elevated my players to play harder to play harder, because they knew that I was getting scrutiny from from the ref. When they started doing that, I was like, wow, you know what, I did my job. And I have to imagine I'd never made rank. I have to imagine that it's probably the same feeling that when your guys work for you, because you're looking out for them, not over them. That that's what that's that's what the job is about. Was it true?
39:45
Oh, yeah. Yeah, definitely. Without doubt, I mean,
39:47
you gotta lead enough. You know, it's a good point. I, I can actually give a lot of credit to the way we came up in policing the, what we call old timers. Yeah. Right. And you Know what I think that that carried on into my career? I could, I could pretty much remember tons of things they used to say to me. It's instilled in me, you know what I mean? And I guess that's, I guess, the way you come on, you know, you live
40:15
and learn from the good and the bad supervisors that you had coming up to, you know,
40:20
I probably learned more from the bad ones Exactly. Like you, you
40:23
got a guy, like I said, he's a, he's a go do this guy, go do this, go do that, go do this. I mean, we had one. We work in a midnight shift. And it was, had to be about five o'clock in the morning. Linares isn't big, but my post was always on the other side of town. Sergeant at the time, calls me over the radio and says, Come back up into town. And I want you to someone called in and said that sequence of light, you know, the red light is out the sequence is out. So could you come up here and check the sequence of life? All right, no problem. I go up there. Soon as I pull up, that sergeant was sitting right there. As I pulled up, he pulled away too fucking lazy to even sit there and check a sequence of life. I mean, Jesus Christ,
41:08
what are you like? What, you know what you said, you got it, you got to show you got to. I mean, as you know, same thing with the military, you know, you gotta You can't just sit back and say, All right, you guys go into this building, and you got to do it, you got to go and do it, you gotta you gotta not double respect you. And if you don't do it, they're not going to respect it's
41:29
don't do as I say, not as I do, type of do as I do. Not as you know that that's you live by example. And those things because I work for some really, really bad bosses. And I think a lot of that comes from, they didn't really work up through the ranks the proper way. They never didn't do all those jobs. So when they got that power, they became very jealous. If you showed talent for an area that they didn't have, or they wanted something. I know the bosses that we had a guy who was in Roseland didn't have a whole lot of shoots, we had a guy who was in a shooting in another department. And the boss hated him for it, because he had never been in a shooting. I swear, I'm not kidding. It's I believe, guys,
42:06
no big deal. I mean, it's really a cutthroat businesses, a lot of a lot of jealousy that goes on in law enforcement. You know, it's, it's not what, what you get, it's what they're not getting. So they hold that against you.
42:20
The funny thing about all this stuff that we're talking about, is we had mentioned the hard part of the job or the suffering of the job as being the criminals. Yeah, they were whatever, they were doing their job. We were doing ours. And that's, so it's and that's where
42:35
respect came. Yeah, as well. I know, it sounds strange. But you know, it that that was the factor in an arrest or whether you're gonna get a, a weapon or not, like, you know, from a criminal you don't I mean, you're obviously not by us, I'm just saying, they respect you for that, you know what I mean? And I used to get this offset, they'll throw down because they don't respect, they're gonna, they're gonna go after
42:57
them. I used to get in trouble. Back when I was married.
43:03
That's a different problem with police.
43:06
They used to say, I used to get told I treat criminals on the street better than I treat people in my own house. And I said, there is some kind of theory behind that. Because you almost have to be friend net criminal. No, I'm saying you in order. Now you gotta go see him every day. You got to go through the whole processing, you get, you know, you got to either send the guy to jail. Or if you kind of got it's combative and you try to fingerprint them. You're never gonna happen. You know? So you had to talk to the guy act. Treat him like these gentlemen or treat the female you know, the right way. And so you had to treat them nice. I mean, I'd be joking with them. Time did I say every which way possible? They bro younger? Yeah, I'll send the kid up the Burger King player.
43:51
Not in Hoboken. They got what grilled cheese in mud.
43:55
Time it's actually just knocked one down too.
43:59
But next time we go to next time I go to Hoboken. Remember? Where is that place?
44:02
Oh, it's my big He's big. He's or when he's wherever. It's a hobo. It's a Hoboken direction. All right, Hoboken direction is they're going to tell you a place that has gone for 20 years. And it's
44:13
back to you to understand that's it. Hold on, let me just go down a block. Just pass that up. And that's it city gate there, page 20
44:20
of the department. But you know, the police one of the things that the public doesn't realize is, is we're human beings. And we see a lot of problems and a lot of people at their worst. There's a lot of damaging calls. And that weighs on us. What do you think, Mike? Mike dipalma Little start with you here. What do you think some of the most damaging calls to your emotional psyche that you ever seen?
44:51
Anything with a child?
44:53
Pediatric? Yeah. How many of you have in your career?
44:56
Probably about three, three or four.
44:59
Now here's the best Question When you had those calls? Did you have children
45:06
at the time now?
45:07
So that was mine. I had pediatric I didn't have children, thankfully. Yeah, at
45:11
the time. And, I mean, there's this many of them. Yeah. You know, I mean, when you're
45:17
talking that you run the range from domestics where somebody just got the snot beat out of him or pediatric, or end of life where there's zero dignity, you know, that people don't realize that everybody thinks,
45:30
you know, it's, it's, it's amazing. The something it's when I drive through Hoboken now, you know, I try to remember playing wiffle ball, or you know, stickball or this and that, like, I'll go through Hoboken now. Like, oh, man, look at that bill, and that woman jumped off it. It's everywhere I go, Oh, that that guy shot himself in that place. Oh, this guy. I'm like, what have you know? And it's, it's, you know, if
46:00
you think about it's not great. No, you take it home. That's
46:03
how that's how I remember. Oh, man, this guy just jumped off that building. Oh, I want to take the pit. This girl just blew my head off. I'm like, holy shit. What happened to the wiffle ball? What happened to the you know, kick the can and it's gone.
46:15
Yeah. Now now it turns into remember that place we used to play with football industry? Yeah, that's what a girl killed herself. Like, wow, you relate it to crimes and just like nasty scenes that you've been to? And
46:26
it's, it's the visual. It's the visual Mike, what do you think? What do you think the most emotionally damaging calls to go on are like, especially for you personally,
46:35
pediatrics are big. You never want that. Thank God in my career, I never had a pediatric death. But some of the hardest things for me were like doing CPR in front of family members. That to me was terrible. I mean, we had one where a guy was having a heart attack. He was laying on his bed. We'd pull them off the bed, put them on the floor. doing CPR on we'll never forget it his
47:02
you can't do CPR on a bed. Right? Yeah, his his
47:05
daughter. She had to be about eight or nine years old. She was on the bed like this. Just looking at it. She goes, is my Daddy gonna die.
47:15
And it was you being the Heartless son of a bitch. He did? Yep.
47:20
That right. What do you say you jump? Right? We're doing everything we can? Yeah,
47:26
you fall back into that routine. You give me the COVID that,
47:31
you know, temperature.
47:37
I've had, I've had some pediatrics are always very dangerous to deal with. Because you gotta you gotta go home after that. And if you have kids, the rule is are that what you're always told is you will superimpose your children's superimpose
47:54
over top I got I got I just don't think I write this stuff down. When I go translating.
47:58
He was on a show once or twice.
48:01
Can you hit like, everything is smooth, it is smooth series layer. You don't even have to fill in my phrases anymore.
48:09
So you superimpose your child's face on to it last pediatric death. But I remember I think the toughest ones for me is when just the the end of life no dignity, you know, you go to some some old person's house to render medical aid they call 911. And you're there and is oh guy's got his balls hanging out or a woman's vagina is hanging out or boobs are out, you know, their teeth are on the ground. They got no hair. They're just there's there's tons of people around them, seeing them at their worst. And I know, I know, for a fact without you guys ever telling me this, you've walked out of medical calls, go and talk to your partner or wherever you're with Don't ever let me get like that. Just take me into Woods into behind. We've all said it. We've all said it. And it sounds very harsh for people to say for us to say that. Especially when when we're in those situations. But I know I don't want to do I don't want to
49:06
die. The normal person doesn't see that every day. And the more enforcement and you know, EMS Field, especially, you know, we see that on a daily basis. You know, we see people when are at their worst. And how do you how do you separate seeing someone at their worst, and especially coming from a small town and someone you know, that was
49:27
that's a before we get into the most rewarding calls. I want to remind our audience, one of our one of our biggest supporters is the grand saloon and Clifton, go out there and visit him. Nick will take really good care you go to 940 van Houghton Avenue in Clifton. Your great food great fun, they're just going the grand saloon.com That's gra n d e saloon.com. Take a look at their menu. I'm telling you it's going to be one of the most happy friendly places you're gonna be great food, good people, and you're gonna have a great time.
49:57
I have to hold on I gotta reverse back. I kind of So I understood that question about pediatrics. I didn't have, I just thought it was, you know, something else. I mean, I've had cases with pediatric you know, note note, that's but you just brought up something. And it was, I was doing CPR on my own father. Oh, and you brought up the thing about the bed like so. That honestly, I have to say, I wasn't even I was home, I wasn't on duty, obviously, we're always on duty. But that probably was probably one of the most impactful things in my career. Like, in just like you said, I quit. I was by myself, you know, listen, you know, I knew he passed. He was young. But that had to be if I go back, that had to be one of
50:42
the worst things working on a family member, you know what, that's that's a different rank, like, and then
50:47
you like, yeah, you're like, you know, I was, you know, I was kind of, you know, I was an instructor and you the guilt, like it was just, you know, but, you know, I didn't that's why you throughout your career, you don't you know, you do as best as you could, you know, because, you know, something like that could happen on your own. You know what I mean? So you treat everybody just like fan. Yeah, you're
51:07
right, you're right, because they're gonna respect you for it. Right? You're gonna give a little bit of compassion at the end of life, because we're all going to get there brother, right? We all got an expiration.
51:15
The other thing too, is what about that helpless feeling? When you lost someone, when you're doing CPR,
51:24
a walk out, put your head in your hands and you feel
51:27
like a loser. You know, walking out past the family. You know, I mean, we obviously did everything we do. Can't look at him. You're sweating like crazy. Your uniforms all disheveled? Because you're just you know, your bag valve mask, pumping on the chest and switching up and everybody's. But you get that feeling like
51:50
what just happened? Your soul is
51:52
gone. Yeah. And now Now you gotta suck that in because you got another call to go to it after that, you know? And how do you how do you leave that CPR call and just act like nothing happened go on to the next school.
52:06
It's it sucks to deal with those, but it is part of the job. We all understand that it's part of the job doesn't mean we gotta like it doesn't mean we got to move past it because we do take that stuff home. But there were some great calls that we all went on. There were some really, really great calls, some rewarding calls. Mike, what do you think the most rewarding call type of call that you could go on?
52:30
I know from what I've heard, I've never seen it but a childbirth apparently very sloppy but rewarding.
52:38
Oh man. I've been there and I started seeing it coming out and I was just like, that's not natural man.
52:45
But But to me, pretty much the most rewarding were CPR saves you when you When paramedics tell you hey, we got a pulse back. Now you sitting there all that hard work. Finally come into fruition and now you're like, you know, you walked out of there. Like I said, when you lose a CPR patient you walk out there and you're you know slumped over, you know, hanging your head. When you hear that you got you know, they got a pulse back. And now you get some pep in your step. Now you're helping them with a stretcher you get your upstairs, you get the ribs and your run down the stairs and all that.
53:23
There's so many losses. It's nice to have a victory.
53:25
Oh yeah. And once listen, I used to call myself defibrillator of death because I lost it and Shawn more people than than I could even keep fucking defibrillator is don't work. I always said I said I should just put the defibrillator up to the guy's balls and give him one last fucking joke because I didn't save him. You know, I was. Listen, I'm not saying I was terrible at it. But you in order to use defibrillator you have I mean, there's a certain timeframe where you have to be there. And you can't be dead for 24 hours and all sudden you end up with a defibrillator. It's not a magic box.
53:58
We found the child that was missing a three year old. We found it less he just wandered off. He's in the woods. But I had kids at the time. And I remember I found them in the woods. He was two he just wandered off. It was It wasn't the parents fault. It was just bad timing. And I remember getting this kid bring him back handed off to the parents. I watched parents give him this gigantic hug. And I remember standing there and I actually put you know how you put your hands on your gun and your radio. And I felt like Superman. I really felt like Superman. Mike, what do you think
54:34
mean obviously, both of what you were talking about. I mean, that's everybody's I think it's everybody police police officers dream, you know, like, Hey, did this I would say you know, mine was in the investigative Bureau you know, just getting through months and months and months of a case and then you finally you solving that puzzle? Yeah, you know, I mean, and that's slightly cracked that I know it's like you know, obviously everything like you know what you're talking about, you know is is fantastic but it's no I guess it's like work and most thing is appreciation. Believe it on like hey you know we're all
55:11
retired now so what do you think what do you still love about the job
55:20
camaraderie you know it it definitely faded away you know i i love that part I mean it's I don't know there's not it's just not the way it used to be you know so I don't want to
55:37
the big thing is once you retire you missed the clowns but you don't miss the circus right you know and that's it I missed the guys I missed the lottery I missed the the ability to actually be able to help people sure, you know,
55:52
but on another note on that one Mike I'm gonna have to call bullshit because what we're doing here with this show, and that's our purpose is to help people
56:00
I'm talking to help in from a law enforcement perspective. You know?
56:06
I help people you don't you just make them feel better about the way they look?
56:09
Yeah, and make them feel taller when I get it and younger and younger. And a lot more hair
56:17
once again the oldest guy in the room
56:21
Listen, we got to get kids Big Ben parliament.
56:23
We actually got to we actually got a world war two vet coming in who was in Normandy really? Finally Mike won't be the oldest man in the room by like a year don't normally a couple of days a couple years. But that's that's our that's our plan. But again, every
56:36
time you want to be an air traffic.
56:39
That's the most stressful job out there, right?
56:41
Yes, it is. But the there's a whole story about us flying out to Florida and we just kept going around Newark airport because couldn't find parking. So it was a whole thing. It was it was like Big Ben parliament from European vacation. Goes by the first time every time you want to be an aircraft controller the second time, same thing. The fifth time, same thing. That's stress. Yeah. But I drive
57:03
on Kevin, around an airport 52 times.
57:07
We got there. Yeah, we got there. Listen, I'm early to everything. So thankfully, this is why I'm early to everything. But you know, I love that job. I really did love that job. And there's a lot of things that I don't miss about it. I don't miss. Again, I worked in a very toxic environment. So I would throw up before I went on patrol. But once I was out in the road, everything was fine. It was calm. That was the that was the master of my own domain, where I was able to either make a difference or do nothing. What I missed the most, and this is gonna sound really crazy is I miss doing accents. I love doing it, too. Oh my I love doing car accidents. Love it. I love the math involved. I love the I love to see what happens.
57:50
It's like now you know what I'm dealing with?
57:53
Yeah, I was I was that guy who loves doing that. Oh my god. As a matter of fact, I made a deal with It's the scariest thing five days to deal with a dispatch I made a guy I made a deal with a guy I used to work on the road, it used to be in the DB, you steal a lot of DVDs. I say you take all the domestic paperwork, I will take every accident, you know, I'm getting the short end of that stick. That's how much I hated domestic violence. But that's also how much I loved doing accidents. Because I loved your showing up to people in there in the worst. They're having the worst moment of that day. And you get the show up there. Look, it's gonna be okay, you take control of the situation, it's very easy to take control of an accident. It's not very easy to take control of a domestic situation. Or any other situation where a crime in progress or somebody's really hurting or a medical call where you lose them. But for an accent it was really easy for me to take control and give them a little bit of happiness, a little bit of peace. And I love doing it all the math involved in it. I love the energy that was created. I love I was I was a crash guy. That was my favorite thing. And I also loved seeing what happens the aftermath of it, following it all the way through. I imagine it's the same thing in the detective bureau. Again, I didn't have kneepads so I didn't get my detective bureau and like both you guys I don't want to point that out. But I got
59:05
put into technically I was in Iraq, so I don't know how that happened. I don't
59:10
because I didn't think you were coming back.
59:12
Oh, this guy bony.
59:15
That's kind of great. Meanwhile, oh my god, I gotta call my sailor for him. Like, we're getting mortared right now and he's telling me I'm going into the bureau I'm like what I saw Hold on. Let me just I can't wait Hang
59:31
on. Keep firing keep firing
59:35
it was all my good you know, I guess they didn't know what was going on at that specific
59:42
I don't think a badge is gonna stop. But that's that's a weird way to find I swear
59:46
I'm telling ya.
59:48
I'm telling you I think maybe they didn't think you
59:50
should know by now my store this series
59:53
every every once in a while you throw something new out. And you'll I'm like fuck you that really messed up. Yeah,
59:59
that's like Did I ever tell you how I found out I got the job and Linares
1:00:04
on episode nine.
1:00:07
I was I was working for the Sheriff's Department at that point and I applied for Lyndhurst. And one day I get a call from my then wife, she says the mayor just call. No, what do you have to say? Because you got the job. What he did, he called my house phone and said, Is Mike there? She said, No, he's working now. Okay, good. Tell him he's got the job and Linares. He starts next Monday. That's the way I found out I got the javelin or see that's
1:00:37
that stuck,
1:00:39
was on the hook to bring it home. We've all seen a lot of different things you guys were on a lot longer than I was not a lot longer, the longer. We've seen different things inside of our law enforcement careers. And you've you've learned a lot. David, if you said you didn't learn a lot, then you weren't doing your job properly. So Mike dipalma, what do you think you've learned from the suffering of police work?
1:01:04
It's, it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. Meaning I could have took different steps. With, uh, you know, mentally, you know, I could have made better choices.
1:01:21
I think that the main thing I learned is never take anything for granted. Never take another day for granted. You never know when you deserve either. Okay, you know? You see you, I mean, you know, you see a guy one day he's a little happy go lucky. And next day, you're at his house, you know, doing CPR on him or he's in a car accident. And we had a guy that was from mortality, retired Trooper one of the biggest burliest guys you'd ever ever want to meet. Great guy. car fanatic. You know, he's always tinkering with his cars and everything. No minor fender bender. And snapped his neck is paralyzed from the shoulders down from Damn, just a minor car accident. Just eat it the wrong way. His neck snapped and he was powerless. That was crazy. He has since passed away God rest his whole but I mean, great guy and happy go lucky, fun loving guy. Because he was retired. So he's fun loving. And, you know, his life just ended right there.
1:02:26
Is it Do we have to go back to the Mickey Mouse?
1:02:28
No, no, I'm just, I'm taking that in that right now. God Darn it. I guess complacency to still trying to think about what he learned in his career. I'm like what wiffle ball, body Jesus God's bread suck up the air. So if
1:02:46
anybody pinched if anybody wants to know about the go to Episode 13, that's my suffering of addiction with Mike De Palma.
1:02:56
I don't know this. I don't know. It's just it was a loving career, but it was also damaging. That's a good one. That's how I kind of you know, I can definitely contest that it's damaging
1:03:10
a lot self imposed also, very,
1:03:13
very much.
1:03:14
It's very, very simple. What I learned, it's, you're never as bad as your worst day, and you're never as good as your best day. I've seen a lot throughout my career, and I've seen good people turn bad. I've seen bad people turn good. And it always gave me hope for humanity. I know that sounds like the greatest line made up in history, but I truly believe it because I've seen a lot of people throughout my life go both ways.
1:03:41
Mikey tried to go deep on us real quick. sentimental and look, he just
1:03:45
I gotta wind it up. That's just came out. No, no, no, it's true.
1:03:52
Mike De Palma. I love you brother.
1:03:55
Always a pleasure having you.
1:03:56
I want to go we have to have to wait man, the lights the lights
1:04:00
the studio in my basement. No more.
1:04:01
I'm just getting started. Someone else's studio
1:04:05
is in my basement. No more brother.
1:04:07
But I will guarantee we will have you back.
1:04:09
Yes, we will definitely have you back if you if you're willing to come down and do some sleeping while you're sleeping here. Drew is that alright? We're good. All right. Yeah. He said it's alright. Okay. All right. So that's gonna do it for this episode of the suffering podcast and let's think about all the stuff that we learned today. Nothing worthwhile is easy. It's not a job. It's a calling. Never take anything for granted. But most importantly, and it's not only because I said it while it is good. I said you're never as bad as your worst day and you're never as good as your best day. choices but a self promoter and episode nine and Prairie Fire hashtag and that's gonna do it for this episode of the suffering podcast. Don't be don't forget to check out Bella dama cigars go to Bella dama cigars.com put in the code suffering 10 for 10% discount check out caffeine water Toyota Hackensack the grand saloon. We're all thankful for you. And don't forget to check out Dennett development project calm and check out our nice challenge coins. And that's going to do it for this episode of the suffering podcast is suffering police officers with Mike De Palma, Mike Falaise, and myself Kevin Donaldson find Mike on Instagram at Mike underscore to Falaise. Find me at real Kevin Donaldson and always follow the suffering podcast, like and subscribe if you if you like what you're putting out, follow our YouTube channel for updates. We'll be putting out about two or three episodes a week. And that's gonna do it for this episode. We'll see you next time.